Rio, Not An American City. For the first time since Gold Fish Racing was introduced to the Summer Olympics in 1978, an American goldfish has won the gold. “I’ve been practicing since I was no bigger than a guppy to be the fastest swimming goldfish in the world, and now, that dream has finally become reality for me,” said Gold Medal winner, Gerry “Wet” Scales. “I’d like to thank my moms and pops for all their support over the years. They taught me that with perseverance and a diet of fresh blood worms, anything is possible. I’ve never been prouder to be a goldfish and an American. This is just so AWESOME! As soon as I get home, I’m taking my girlfriend to Disney Land to celebrate.”
My dog is addicted to rabbits. Every time we go for a walk, I come home with a sore arm from having her pull me as she searches for, finds, and tries to chase after rabbits. She looks under bushes, behind iron fences, and in flower beds in her continual quest to find and chase rabbits. I don’t know what she’d do if she caught one, probably pass out from the pure joy of the experience, but she’s a very kind and playful pup and I doubt she’d intentionally try to kill it. I tell you, my dog is the greatest thing in my life. What a joyful, happy friend she is to me, far better than most of the people I know. I’d truly be lost without her.
Meow Mix Central, South Dakota. A professional cat juggler today, Ned Kneeler, quite his job after being scratched on the arm whilst twirling 3 cats in the air simultaneously. “It REALLY hurt,” Mr. Kneeler said earlier. “I reached out to take hold of one of the cats, and it scratched my arm. The pain was so severe, as was the shock of what had just happened to me, that I almost dropped the three cats I was juggling on the ground. I didn’t, and they’re all safe, but I’m done juggling cats for a living. I’ve been doing it ever since I learned how from a traveling gypsy woman almost 30 years ago. If I’d had known then what I do now, that cats don’t like to be juggled and can scratch you while you’re doing it, I’d have found a different way to make my living. I’m out of the cat juggling business as of today. Luckily, I still have a thriving infant juggling business to keep me afloat until I find something else to do. I wonder if puppy juggling might not be safer?”
Zygote Valley, North Carolina. A 10 month old boy today, Little Timmy Taun-Taun, was shocked to discover he’s actually only 9 months old. “My mom screwed up,” Little Timmy said whilst having his diaper changed. “She has a form of dyslexia that causes her to confuse one month with another. So, though my mom thought I was born on September 9th of 2015, it was actually October 9th of 2015 when I was born. She figured this out when she more carefully looked over my birth certificate, something she probably should have done much sooner given her condition. Any way, she apologized to me for the mistake, and I’ve forgiven her. Now, if you’ll excuse me, it’s time for my bottle.”
The Invisible Man stopped by our Tokyo office the other day with a few selfies he wanted us to show to our readers. Here they are for your perusal.
Engaging America's Voters
Comics, Creators, Culture
Independent views from someone who offers some historical context
An Online Record of his Hate Speech Including Anti-gay Propaganda and the Minimising of Child Rape.
Where are we going today?
by E.B. de Mas, reachable at: email@example.com
A French girl's musings...
Someone's got to say it, so it might as well be me
Satirical & Poetic Musings Of A Self-Proclaimed Nobel Prize Winner
Searching for truth while leaving tradition behind.
Analysis & Discussion For Political Uncertainty
“The road to enlightenment is long and difficult, and you should try not to forget snacks and magazines.” ― Anne Lamott
Things I want to say about this, that, and the other thing.
Ideas and musings from a middle-aged 20 something
Let's face it, your religion is probably wrong.
Cogito Ergo Sum
One minute info blogs escaping the faith trap
A photo journal of my interests from one extreme to the other.
Life at № 42
Random musings about everything.
Be aware - may contain spiders and swearing
Welcome — Come Immerse, Convalesce, Spark, Dialogue or Simply Discern
The Wanderings and wonderings of a sentient cloud.
*Not really about marriage. Welcome anyway.
Smexy Historical Romance
A welcoming space for resistance to the forces of oppression and hegemony.
Mostly mundane science fiction and world building
The Many Things In My Toy Box ....my view may change due to verifiable evidence
Comic-books, Horror movies, Video-games...oh my!
Picturing the bleak
philosophy, secular buddhism, culture, semiotics
war some of the time
Into the Gray
THE DRIVELLINGS OF TWATTERSLEY FROMAGE
Social commentary from a perspective of moral secularism
How one atheist sees life
NeuroResearchProject.com -- It's about the brain. It's about the environment. It's about being human.
For the establishment of secular, liberal, humanist and republican orbital space settlements
Don't ask me to be an idiot