1.) I’ve never used duct tape for this type of procedure before, but, like they say, there’s a first time for everything.
2.) Well, Mr. Smith, I’m sorry to inform you, but, from now on, you’ll have to pee sitting down.
3.) Now, don’t move. I’ll need to keep my hand up here for about ten minutes or we’ll need to start all over.
4.) No, it is NOT supposed to be that color?
5.) There’s a 65% chance you’ll still be able to have sex after this.
6.) Ms. Johnson, the next time I have to remove one of these from you, I’m going to notify PETA.