Dracula, Prince Of Idiocy, premiers tonight on Pontificator TV.   The show stars Ken Ham as Dracula, a vampire who, rather than sucking blood, sucks logic and reason out of his victims until they blindly follow him and his idiotic belief that the Earth is only 6000 years old and the Bible is the inerrant word of God.

Ken Ham IS Dracula

As his nemesis, we have Neil deGrasse Tyson as Professor Abraham Van Helsing, a scientist so appalled by the idiocy of everything Dracula stands for he has dedicated his life to stopping him.

Neil deGrasse Tyson IS Professor Abraham Van Helsing

As Dracula’s slave and mindless minion, we have Bill Maher as Renfield.

Bill Maher IS Renfield

As the woman Dracula most wants to suck the reason from, we have The Virgin Mary as Mina Harker.

The Virgin Mary IS Mina Harker, Dracula’s Prey

Lastly, as the only weapon that can completely destroy Dracula and ruin his evil plan to suck humanity’s reason dry, we have a photo of Charles Darwin that was consecrated real by Carl Sagan in 1979.

Charles Darwin’s Photo IS The Only Antidote To Dracula’s Bite

Dracula, Prince Of Idiocy, debuts tonight on Pontificator TV.  Watch it, or I’ll make fun of you.  Imperious Rex!