Tonight on Pontificator TV we bring you a unique re-imaging of the Neil Simon classic, The Odd Couple staring Pope Francis as Felix and Mr. T as Oscar. Enjoy the hilarity as two men, who could not be more different, find themselves trapped together in a Manhattan studio apartment during a zombie apocalypse. Leave their apartment and they risk being eaten alive by the living dead. Stay in their apartment and they risk driving each other insane with their petty quirks and personality glitches. How do they survive? Watch tonight and laugh your ass off as you find out.
“Oscar, you left your filthy underwear on the couch again. You’re more disgusting than the flesh-eating ghouls roaming outside our door!”
“Listen here, Felix! I pity the fool who moves my things, even my dirty undies, without askin’ me first. Do it again, and I toss yer communion wafer eatin’ ass out the door, ‘n those ghouls out there look HUNGRY!”
“BRAINS! BRAINS! BRAINS!”
Coming this Christmas to a movie theater near you: Star Trek: The Christian Generation, an Arm Chair Pontificator Production.
Directed by Martin Scorsese
Pope Francis as Captain Huggie Cuddles: A very human captain trying to keep a crew with various cultural and ethical differences from killing each other before their mission is complete.
Sam Harris as First Officer, Commander Tu’Smart: A Vulcan who has a great respect for science but very little respect for illogical thinking and the religious right.
Mr. T as Security Chief, Piti’da’Ful: A Klingon with a bad temper and long time boyfriend to Ship’s Counselor, Lt. Annie Tight.
Miley Cyrus as Ship’s Counselor, Lt. Annie Tight: A sexy transgendered Human babe and long time lover of Security Chief, Piti’da’Ful
Ken Ham as Science Officer, Duddly Dullman: A Human whose wits are not always about him and whose conclusions are rarely backed by logic, reason or science.
Ship’s Mission: To check on the status of gay marriage and the ease of access to loaded hand guns throughout the galaxy while forcing the word of Jesus onto all those encountered.
Main Antagonists: Liberals from the Liberal quadrant of the galaxy: A group of free thinking radicals who oppose the forcing of any ideology or clothing onto anyone not wanting them.
Liberals In The Clothing Optional Liberal Quadrant
Tickets available now. Get yours early before they’re sold out. Hope to see you at the theater this Christmas.