Tag Archives: John the Baptist

01.10.16
by

Bible Folks In Ascots

Here are a few pics of folks from the Bible looking stunning in ascots.

1.) John the Baptist

He looked so amazing in this ascot, I barely noticed John the Baptist was missing his head.

He looks so stupendous in this lovely ascot, you barely notice his missing head.

 

2.) Yahweh

The Godfather of All Things has never looked more content than he does sporting this fabulous ascot.

The Godfather of All Things has never looked more content than he does sporting this fabulous ascot.

 

3.) Jesus

The Son of Man looks about as "GQ" as one can get wearing this masculinely patterned ascot.

The Son of Man looks about as “GQ” as one can get wearing this masculinely patterned ascot.

 

4.) Saint Peter

Though he looks a tad dainty in this white, fluffy ascot, Christ still built his church upon this rock of a man.

Though he looks a tad dainty in this white, fluffy ascot, Christ still built his church upon this rock of a man.

 

5.) Judas Iscariot

Apparently this fallen Apostle spent all 30 pieces of the silver he received to betray Jesus on this striking blue ascot and suit jacket.

Apparently this fallen Apostle spent all 30 pieces of the silver he received to betray Jesus on this striking blue ascot and suit jacket.

11.24.13
by

King Herod To Host 2018 Annual Heaven/Hell Christmas Party

King Herod will be hosting the annual Heaven/Hell Christmas party at his home in Topeka, Kansas next month. “To be honest, I’m surprised Jesus asked me to do this after last year’s fiasco,” Herod said.  “To make a long story short, after 4 Vodka martini’s each, Mao Tse Tung and I thought it would be hysterical to put John the Baptist’s severed head in Jesus’ bed with a note saying, ‘We made you an offer you couldn’t refuse’  like in the ‘Godfather’, you know.  Well, what we didn’t know was that Jesus, who’s got a great sense of humor, and Yahweh, who doesn’t have ANY, had switched rooms for the night.

God Gives Head He Found In Bed To Hotel Maid

Yahweh Handing Human Head He Found In His Bed To Hotel Maid For Disposal

Needless to say, there was a lot of yelling and screaming that went on when Yahweh crawled into bed that night.  Most everyone there blamed Hitler for it, cause, well, he’s a dick, but I’m positive Jesus knew it was Mao Tse Tung and me who did it. Guess his sense of humor is better than I thought since he’s asked me to host the party this year.  He’s cool like that.”