Sarcastic Leaders From History

Donald Trump said recently that President Obama was the founder of ISIS.  He repeated this several times over the past several days and continually reiterated he meant exactly what he said: President Obama is the founder of ISIS.  This morning, however, Trump stated the media had twisted his words into something he never actually meant.  He now claims he was merely being sarcastic.  Yes, once again, it’s not the Donald’s fault for saying something idiotic, wrong, crude, and insulting, it’s the media’s fault for being too stupid to see he didn’t mean what he actually said.  Way to go there, Donny.  Thing is, Trump is not the first person in history to do this.  Over the years, several famous world leaders have done this exact same thing, often with less than stellar results.  Here are a few of them along with the sarcastic things they said.

1.)

Henry The Eight is famous for sarcastically saying," Cut off Anne Boleyn's head. She cheated on me and is a whore." Henry was later shocked to learn that his sarcastic words were taken literally and his beloved wife's head was actually cut off. OOPS!!!

Henry The Eight is famous for sarcastically saying, after an argument with his wife, ” Cut off Anne Boleyn’s head. She cheated on me and is a whore.” Henry was later shocked to learn that his guards took his sarcastic words quite literally and his beloved wife’s head was actually cut off. OOPS!!!

 

2.)

Adolf Hitler once said, rather sarcastically, "Well then, why don't you just imprison all Jews then gas them and burn the bodies." Hitler's words were taken quite literally by those who followed him, and millions of Jews died because of it. Hitler's response to this was to say, "Well, if people are so stupid as to not know when I'm being sarcastic, it's on them for what they do, not me."

Adolf Hitler once said, rather sarcastically, “Well then, why don’t we just imprison all the Jews, gas them to death, and then burn the bodies.”  Hitler’s words were taken quite literally by his SS minions  and millions of Jews died because of it. Hitler’s response to this was to say, “Well, if people are so stupid as to not know when I’m being sarcastic, it’s on them if they do what I said to do, not me.”

 

3.)

When learning the Americans had an atomic weapon and what it could do if used, President Truman sarcastically said, "Well go ahead and drop the fucking thing then. Hell, drop two of the mother fuckers. That'll learn 'em, eh?" After the bombs were dropped, Truman was reported to have said, "WHAT! I didn't actually mean what I said. I was being sarcastic. What kind of idiots do I have working for me?"

When learning America had an atomic weapon and what it could do if used, President Truman sarcastically said, “Well go ahead and drop the fucking thing then. Hell, drop two of the mother fuckers. That’ll learn them fuckin’ Japs, eh?” After the bombs were dropped, Truman was reported to have said, “WHAT! I didn’t actually mean what I said. I was being sarcastic. What kind of idiots do I have working for me?”

 

4.)

Nixon said once, quite sarcastically, I'll add, "I think we should put a bug in the Watergate Hotel so we can hear what those stinking Democrats are planning." Upon leaving office to avoid an impeachment because his men actually did what he suggested, Nixon said," The biggest problem with Americans is they simply don't know when someone's being sarcastic."

President Nixon said once, quite sarcastically, I’ll add, “I think we should put a bug in the Watergate Hotel so we can hear what those fuckin’ Democrats are planning.” Upon leaving office to avoid an impeachment because his men actually did what he suggested, Nixon said,” The biggest problem with Americans today is they simply don’t know when someone’s being sarcastic.”

Ask Henry The 8th: A New Advice Column From The Arm Chair Pontificator

Dear King Henry, I'm 16 years old and have a dating problem I hope you can help me with. I've been dating a girl named Kathrine for about a year now, but have fallen in love with another girl named Ann whom I'd rather date. I've begged and pleaded with Kathrine to please let me free so Ann and I can be together, but she refuses to release me from our vow to go steady until the end of days. How can I convince Kathrine to let me free so I can date Ann, my true soul mate. Thanks for your time, Peter P. Imple, Esquire.

Dear King Henry, I’m 15 years old and have a dating problem I hope you can help me with.  I’ve been dating a girl named Ann for about a year now, but recently I met, and fell in love with, another girl named Jane whom I’d rather date.  I’ve begged and pleaded with Ann to please let me free so Jane and I can be together, but she refuses to release me from our vow to go steady until the end of days.  How can I convince Ann to let me free so I can date Jane, my true soul mate?   Thanks for your time, Peter P. Imple, Esquire.

 

Dear Peter, let me start by saying you've come to the right guy with this problem. I faced many such situations throughout my lifetime, and I simply must tell you without the real threat of beheading, woman are damn hard to get rid of. So, I suggest you hire some really mean murderous thugs and buy yourself a sturdy chopping block along with a huge-ass ax. Then, have one of the thugs hold Kathrine's head down on the chopping block whilst the other waves the ax in front of her saying, "Let Peter break up with you or I'm gonna chop off your fuckin' head." Hopefully, that should do the trick. If it doesn't, and you REALLY want to be with Ann, you'll just have to whack off Kathrine's head. It's messy, but, take it form me, it works every time. Hope this helps. Yours in tyrannical leadership, Henry 8th of England.

Dear Peter, let me start by saying you’ve come to the right guy with this problem.  I faced many such situations throughout my lifetime, and I simply must tell you, without the real threat of beheading, women are damned difficult to get rid of.  So, I suggest you hire some really mean, murderous thugs and buy yourself a sturdy chopping block and a very large axe.  Then, abduct Ann from her bed at night and have one of the thugs hold her head down on the chopping block whilst the other waves the axe in front of her shouting, “Let Peter break up with you or we’ll chop off your fuckin’ head.” Hopefully, that will do the trick.  If it doesn’t, and you REALLY want to be with Jane, you’ll just have to whack off Ann’s head.  It’s messy, but, take it from me, it WILL solve your dating problem.  Hope this helps.
Yours in tyrannical leadership, Henry VIII of England.