Coming this Spring to TACP Cable Sports Network: Three famous Rocky Balboa opponents will battle it out with three famous, and very annoying, Christians in three, twelve round boxing matches. The fights, and their contestants, are listed below. It all begins this March, so make sure your Cable subscriber carries TACP Network or you’ll miss out on what is sure to be some good old fashion ass-kicking of some really annoying, blow-hard Christians.
William “The Wind-Bag” Craig
Clubber “I Pity Da Fool” Lang
Ken “The Canned” Ham
Ivan “I Must Break You” Drago
Bryan “The Asshole” Fischer
Apollo “The King Of Sting” Creed
These fights are guaranteed to make the Bill Nye/Ken Ham debate from last year look like a wrestling match between two newborn kittens. You don’t want to miss ’em. Order ’em now so you won’t. $Amen$
Hate Inc: Our Hate Is So Hot The “H” Burns
Hello. My name is Henry Hatenweiner. I’m the founder and spokesman of a new hate group called “Hate Inc.” I created the group for the sole purpose of hating and persecuting individuals and groups that hate others in a sanctimonious and self-righteous manner simply because they are different. One of the group’s main targets recently has been the American Family Association headed by Bryan Fischer. The AFA is a group of Christians who use the name of their god, Jesus, to justify their deep hatred of the LGBT community and anyone else who doesn’t fit under their banner of “a good Christian.” We at Hate Inc hate the AFA very deeply. They sicken us. And because they sicken us, we have made it our goal in life to persecute them by burning large letter “H’s” on their front lawns and by sponsoring various hate rallies in front of their churches where hateful obscenities are shouted at them as they enter and leave Sunday services. We want them to know what it feels like to be hated just for being who they are in a very public way. We are also lobbying hard in Washington to have Congress deny members of the AFA the right to marry each other. Why? Because we hate them and do not feel they deserve the same rights as people we don’t hate.
Bryan Fischer & The AFA: Hate Inc Hates Them
If our campaign of hate against the AFA goes well, and why wouldn’t it, we will launch campaigns of intense hate against the KKK and pedophile rapist Catholic priests as well. Why? Because we hate them, and feel they deserve every ounce of negativity we can muster up to throw at them. So, if any of this sounds interesting to you and you’d like to put your hatred of hate groups to good use, you can contact us on our website: hatethehaters.org. We look forward to hating with you.