The following 10 statements are all true. “They” all say this. And when have “they” ever been known to be wrong?
1.) Atheists are people who do not believe in the real God.
2.) It is harmless to dismiss all news you don’t agree with as fake.
3.) When Republicans say they want to get rid of food stamps, SSI, Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid, they’re only talking about taking them away from illegal aliens, black people, Democrats, and Hispanics, not real Americans who depend on these programs to live.
4.) If you do not accept Jesus as your true Lord and Savior, you’re a Muslim.
5.) White, Christian men do not commit acts of terrorism in the U.S. Only dark-skinned Muslims are terrorists. White men who shoot up churches and schools are simply “mentally ill”.
6.) If you believe in equality under the law for women and equal pay for equal work for women, you’re gay.
7.) If you’re a transgender women you’re merely a male who wants to go into women’s restrooms to rape them. Transgender women raping genetic women in restrooms across America is the greatest crisis facing Republicans today.
8.) There are no poor people in America–only very lazy people who refuse to work.
9.) Men who believe in climate change are beta cucks.
10.) The wealthiest people in America deserve the biggest tax cuts because they work the hardest, are extremely good-looking, and believe very strongly in the Lord Jesus Christ who loves money, and real estate, more than his own mother.
$Amen$
Am I a Muslim?
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Devout!
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Goes to find Mecca on a map
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From Kenya, head north-northeast until you get to Port Sudan on the Red Sea. Then, pray Moses parts it for you. But, cross quickly because the pagan Egyptians might chase you in their chariots. Once on the other side, turn left at the Aramco fuel station and you’ll soon arrive at Mecca. But, whatever you do, don’t mention the name Khashoggi! If Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman finds out, it’ll be curtains for ya buddy!
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And don’r eat at the Taco Bell there, either. I did, and I had the runs for 3 days after.
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That’s rough…
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I was on a crowed, very hot Greyhound bus when it happened. It was rough for a lot of people.
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That crowd must’ve gotten quite surly!
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Well, they weren’t happy with me. Let’s just leave it at that.
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This is a risk I am not willing to take. The prince might be told on arrival that I have quite a low opinion of the prophet and have me sent to the netherworld promptly
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I must go back to school very quickly, for I find that I have been mis-defining the word ‘truth’ all these years!!! 🤦
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I’m sure you have. Good luck to you! 🙂
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I remember debating Loy, and he kept saying he wouldn’t believe in a god like that either. So, Loy, what’s your definition of god? Incomprehensible. He couldn’t say. As far as you being Muslim, you’ve admitted to that sheveral times over the years. And, since you’re not Christian, must be true.
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Naturally.
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Inspired! Divine! Pass the plate oh lawdgod almighty.
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$Amen$
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I find much truth in your truths. 😃
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Awesome!
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I used to think that the truth would set me free. But, after reading this, I now think that the truth would make me a bible-thumping, hate-mongering, Republican asshole.
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That comment is an insult to Republicans, and, yes, they deserve it. 🙂
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Nailed it.
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That’s what Jesus said to the Roman soldier nailing him to the cross. 🙂
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And by their works shall ye know them …
And BTW — you forgot one very important TRUTH™ …
I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life. No one comes to the Father except through me. –Jesus Christ (Who?)
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“No one comes to the Father except through me AND a hundred thousand dollar donation to the Christian Church of your choice.”
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I like your version better … only problem, I’m a little short on the donation.
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Save up. You’ll get there. 🙂
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Maybe if I also pray?
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Oh, that goes without saying. Nothing good in life would EVER happen without prayer.
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