I’m Sorry I was Naked When….

I’m Sorry I Was Naked When ….

1.)  …. I crawled into your parents bedroom window late one night to introduce myself as your fiance.

2.)  …. I delivered flowers to your 98-year-old grandmother at her nursing home on a sunny Summer day.

3.)  …. I played Santa one Christmas at a downtown dept store.

4.)  …. I applied for a job at the FBI building in New York in the middle of a blizzard a few years ago.

5.)  …. I borrowed your sister’s bike to ride around town with for a few hours and not returning it til the police told me I had to.

6.)  …. I showed up at your son’s Bar Mitzvah and asked if I could borrow some sugar.

7.)  …. I got pulled over for speeding and had to tell the cops I’d left my wallet at home.

8.)  …. I tried to hail a taxi in downtown Chicago at 4AM one winter night in ’97.

9.)  …. I tried to file a sexual harassment complaint against my fellow KFC workers during spring break from my classes at Harvard one year.

10.)  …. I showed up at a children’s birthday party in Chucky Cheese and demanded they give me a slice.

 

 

 

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16 thoughts on “I’m Sorry I was Naked When….

  1. I liked #4 the best, but I’m curious how one protects ones equipment, naked, in a blizzard?

    Like

  2. #5 — those police fellows never understand the need for nakedness, do they?

    Like

  3. I’m sorry I was naked when… I pulled down my pants and peed on the top step of an outdoor apartment building staircase at night in a drunken stupor.

    True story – not me, my neighbor.

    Like

  4. Hahahahahaha – number ten! All of them actually but that one had me laughing the most.

    Esme Cloud

    Like

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