Stephen Miller To Publish Cookbook

Stephen Miller: Cookbook Author

Cannibal City, Iowa.   Donald Trump’s senior policy advisor, Stephen Miller, announced today he will soon be publishing a cookbook entitled, The Only Good Immigrant Is A Cooked Immigrant.   “Many people have falsely assumed I’m not very fond of immigrants,” Miller said earlier.  “This is simply not true.  I LOVE immigrants, if they’re cooked correctly.  See, ever since I was a small boy, skinning cats alive in my parent’s basement, I’ve dreamed of welcoming people from foreign lands into my home and cooking them.   In this context, immigrants are only an issue when too many arrive at once and there are not enough kitchens and/or cooks to accommodate them.   In order to correct this problem, I’ve decided to publish an immigrant cookbook to encourage more Americans to do as I do: cook and eat immigrants.

Got a problem with too many Polish immigrants moving into your building?   Then buy my cookbook and learn how to make REAL Polish sausage by killing, pulverizing, and cooking a few of them to thin out their numbers.   Too many Italian immigrants moving into your city?  Then buy my cookbook and learn how to turn them into meat lasagna in just 4 easy steps.   Like my pappy always used to say to me, ‘Stephen, there ain’t no immigrant you’ll dislike if you cook ’em right.’

My book will be out in early November, just in time for Christmas.  You can pre-order one right now on my website,, for just $68.94.  I’ll toss in a free “Sociopaths Are Fake News” t-shirt with the first 1000 orders, so act fast if you want one.    Happy eatin’ America.  I’ll see you in the kitchen.” 

19 thoughts on “Stephen Miller To Publish Cookbook

  1. I thought you meant
    Steve Miller
    You know
    Time keeps on ticking into the future
    Well you can see
    I’m not well reverse in politics


  2. He stole that idea from me! Next year I will open a restaurant in downtown Amsterdam where I’ll serve cooked tourists as you know the only good tourists are cooked tourists…


  3. Great post. I’m interested in the cook book. What do I cook if I’m tired of too many incompetent politicians and a chaotic White House?

    Check out my thoughts on the GOP’s immigration bill I would greatly appreciate a follow if your interested and I would love to respond to comments


  4. So which area has the best young immigrant veal type? Which makes the best one for tender baby ribs? Oh so many choices of sauces I am so glad you did the cookbook, it makes it so much easier. Thanks, and timely with Xmas right around the corner. Hugs

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I could not believe the level of right wing density displayed by this fucking moron which I witnessed recently.

    Your insights here could be closer to truth than fiction.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. … with fava beans and a nice Chianti.


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