1.) I attempted to collude with Russia to become Mayor of Chicago, but, since Putin did not return my phone calls, it didn’t pan out.
2.) I tried to have conjugal visits with several women in the Cook County prison system, but, since none of them knew who I was, it didn’t pan out.
3.) I auditioned to become an internet porn star, but, because I refused to remove my clothes, it didn’t pan out.
4.) I tried to set a record time of 43 minutes in a local marathon, but, because I did the course in my car, it didn’t pan out.
5.) I attempted to become the first Jewish, Asian, Pope in the history of the Catholic Church, but, because I’m not Jewish, Asian, or a Catholic, it didn’t pan out.
The Arm Chair Pontificator 
Bummer, dude.
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I know. I feel SO unfairly treated in all my endeavors. Kinda like our poor, poor President. SAD! 🙂
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You need freewill.
You can do whatever you want with it
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That’s SO true!
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So maybe stop using a pan and use freewill
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May understanding is all freewill comes in a pan.
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Buy a bigger pan then, it will have more freewill in it
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Good idea.
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I tried calling Putin once, I got the damnable automated call answering robot. It went like “If your name is Trump, or are associated with his White House circle, press 1.” If you are a journalist press 2 for the KGB.” If you are a anti Russian political opponent stay on the line and the KGB will come to you.”
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Yeah, I got that message, too. 🙂
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Chin up, the day of the gay, black, nuclear powered harp seals is coming, mark my work. You’re going to be a star!
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Awesome.
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Dang but that Putin is as hard ass as the nobel prize committee. You will have to put these people in their place soon. Hugs
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I’ll keep trying. 🙂
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Damn, dude, I think you need a new pan!
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I had one, two actually, but they didn’t pan out.
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