Dear Black Hole, lately I’ve been feeling like the whole world sucks. I want to stop feeling like this because many people are telling me it doesn’t suck, at least not all of it. Do you have any advice to help me stop feeling this way? Thanks, Jenny Jinglebuns, a Catholic Nun
Dear Sr. Jinglebuns, thanks for asking me this question. It’s lonely out here in space, and I greatly appreciate any communication I receive from other sentient beings. Unfortunately, I can’t entirely help you with your question. You see, I’m the king of sucking. I suck EVERYTHING around me into me, even light. Why, just the other day, a spacecraft was flying by me, but, before I could even say hello, the entire thing shot past by my event horizon and was sucked into the oblivion that is the core of my being. All I can really offer you on this matter is this: If I didn’t suck, I wouldn’t exist. Thus, just because something sucks, it doesn’t mean it’s bad. Thanks again for writing, and have a grand day. Yours always, A Black Hole
The Arm Chair Pontificator 
Hey, I don’t know if you’re into this sort of thing, but I nominated you for the Mystery Blogger Award. 🙂
https://jenniferpaetsch.com/2017/04/28/the-mystery-blogger-award/
Congrats my friend!
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Thanks a lot. Much appreciated.
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You’re welcome!
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Of course, you can always email the White House and ask an asshole. 😀
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Correction: a mother fucking, orange, Putin-loving, traitorous asshole. 🙂
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Brilliant! Please don’t lose your sense of humour. I know it’s hard, but please don’t!
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“I know it’s hard…” That’s what she said. 🙂
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I really shouldn’t find this as funny as I do 😁
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That’s what she said. 🙂
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I’m pretty sure if tRump read this he would wonder why there weren’t any white holes in space. And he’d be pretty sure they did not suck!
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Orange holes, that is. 🙂
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HAH! Perfect Jeff. 😉 On a bit of a (more? less?) serious note and aside from 1600 Pennsylvania Ave NW, this reminds me of a Native American Indian proverb…
“One day an old Native American grandfather was talking to his grandson. He said, “There are two wolves fighting inside all of us – the wolf of fear and hate, and the wolf of love and peace.“
The grandson listened, then looked up at his grandfather and asked, “Which one will win?”
The grandfather replied, “The one we feed.””
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Superb proverb.
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“If I didn’t suck, I wouldn’t exist.” Boy have I been there!
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Me too. 🙂
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I wonder if there are blow holes in space?
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I wonder, too.
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I know where there is a blowhard …
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The White House.
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Gosh … you sure figured that out in a hurry! 😉
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I’m smart that way. 🙂
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Initialos JB, perhaps?
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Actually, more like DT. But when one gets right down to it, there are certainly others! 😉
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And the vast majority of them are in tRump’s cabinet. 🙂
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