A Request From Prince Namor, The Sub-Mariner

Hi.  Prince Namor, the Sub-Mariner, here.   Before I get started, let me warn everyone reading this, I'm VERY sensitive about 2 things: The tiny wings on my feet, and the big, pointy crown on my head.  Make fun of them, or giggle at them, and I'll stick my big-ass scepter up your tushy.  So, no laughing.  Now, on to business.  As many of you may know, I live underwater in the Kingdom of Atlantis.  Yes, Atlantis, remember now, no laughing.  Thing is, in Atlantis, the only thing we wear are s

Hi. Prince Namor, the Sub-Mariner, here.  Before I get started, let me just warn everyone that I’m VERY sensitive about a few things: the tiny wings on my feet, the big, pointy crown on my head, and people thinking I’m a dandy because I’m dressed in this tiny Speedo.  Make fun of these things, or giggle at me in any way because of them, and I’ll stick my big-ass scepter up your tiny tushy.  So, no laughing.  Now, on to my request.  As many of you may know, I live underwater in the Kingdom of Atlantis.  Oh, no laughing about that either.  I live in Atlantis and I’m a Prince.  Deal with it.  But I digress.  My purpose for coming here today is to ask people who swim in the ocean to please stop peeing in it.  I LIVE IN IT, PEOPLE!  Do I come into your home and pee in it?  Of course not.  So, please, stop peeing in mine.  It’s friggin’ gross.  Thanks, and have a nice day.

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17 thoughts on “A Request From Prince Namor, The Sub-Mariner

  1. Hahahaha! Why do I get the feeling that this delightful morsel of a post is actually a very fine parody about “other creatures” — aquatic or not — chronically suffering from acute tunnel-vision with only a very small vernacular and even smaller vocabulary!?

    Spot on Jeff! Bravo Sir. 😉 ❤

  2. Perhaps people peeing in the ocean is a metaphor for what they think of our prince…

    If any water based person wants to be taken seriously he has to lose the feathered feet and ditch the speedo.

  3. Did you hear (of course you have) that the Russians have video of Trump pissing on prostitutes (golden shower) taken in Moscow?

  4. I can empathize with your request, Prince, but can you explain how the whales, dolphins, seals and others “do it” without messing up the waters? Just wondering out loud…

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