“Hey, man,” says Pepe the Frog, “Why ain’t Black Friday called White Friday?”
Tadpole Town, Oklahoma. Spokesman and symbol for the Alt Right movement, Pepe the Frog, said today it is highly racist and insulting to call the day after Thanksgiving, Black Friday. “It feels bad, man,” Pepe said earlier. “Why ain’t the day after Thanksgiving called White Friday? Somethin’ wrong with the color white? Oh, wait! Of course there is. White is the color of the most horribly maligned and abused men in America: xenophobic, racist, misogynistic bigots. What the hell gives people the right to frown on a group of white dudes simply because they’re misogynists, bigots and racists? Prick these men and will they not bleed? Call them names and will they not cry? Give them a black President and will they not feel marginalized and outraged? They are but human, and it’s time they were treated that way.
Every year these poor men must endure the blatant horror that is the day after Thanksgiving: Black Friday. Well, I say enough. Now that we have an orange President who understands the trauma these men have suffered under the color of Barrack Obama’s skin for 8 years, it’s time to do right by ’em and re-name Black Friday, White Friday. Black has had its time in the sun. It’s time to send it back to the 18th century so that the better color, white, can once again dominate every facet of the American life. And what better way is there to help do this then by re-naming Black Friday, White Friday? None that I can think of, that’s for sure.”
The Arm Chair Pontificator 
Trump means fart in England – just so you know
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Over here it means “smegma face”.
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Even better! 😭
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🙂
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Congratulations! You made it into today’s Cyanide & Happiness! I’m sure the licensing fees and royalty checks are on their way.
http://explosm.net/comics/4473/
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Great job, you tied it all together with what is happening and made it believable real news story. Wow what a really screwed up country we will have for the next four years. You were so right in your comments. Hugs
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I still feel sick over this.
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Me also. Hugs
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great dammit!
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Sadly the same number of people who thought voting for Trump was a great idea, will think this is a geat idea too…
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I think you’re quite right about that.
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Why not make it Orange Friday. Not that I have anything for Orange
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Trump might just do that.
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There are many who wouldn’t take the above as satirical at all, just as, “well, of course!”
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Oh, I know. I know people like that, and that’s why I wrote this. America is SO fucked, satire can’t do it justice.
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How about “Commercial Insanity Friday”?
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Or, Friday To Support Capitalism And Big Business?
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Apropos.
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Apocalypse Now.
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Personally, I think it should actually be Pink Friday 😀
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Look, these poor bigots just had 8 years of a black president. You can’t expect ’em to accept a “Pink Friday”. Too gay. Real white misogynistic racists also are personally hurt because gay people exist, don’t ya’ know.
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Wouldn’t be a bit surprised if Pepe’s wish came true …
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It just might. BTW, the Alt Right uses this Pepe character to make REALLY offensive memes. Look him up on Google.
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Heil Trump!
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Did you see that today, at a rally, Trump was given the Nazi salute by the crowd as they shouted, “Heil Trump!”? Yeah, he and Clinton were both equally bad. My fat ass they were. This is really gonna suck.
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I did see it. Time to buy shares in knee-high leather boots and brown fabric.
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Already have mine.
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Yes, I’m fond of brown too, which might be a problem fairly soon 😦
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Just reading this about Trump’s media bashing meeting
http://nypost.com/2016/11/21/donald-trumps-media-summit-was-a-f-ing-firing-squad/
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Yeah. I saw that. The media needs to simply come at this guy now, but they won’t. He’s too good for ratings so they’ll keep sucking on his anus. Two weeks. This is just two weeks into this idiots run and already a circus has been unleashed. He’s bashing SNL and Alec Baldwin for making fun of him on his Twitter account. What a fuckin’ baby.
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Did you hear he hit the Argentine president up for approving some building project of his that had been stalled?
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Yes I did. The President-elect is using his position to make $ for himself, just like the founding fathers of America intended. People who voted for this guy are idiots.
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