Donald Trump Admits He Never Wears Underwear

Donald Trump Says, "I Never Wear Underwear."

Donald Trump Says, “I Never Wear Underwear.”

Freed Willy City, New York.   Donald Trump today shocked the country when he admitted he has traveled the world “commando” style since the mid-seventies.  “It’s SO liberating to have my orange willy-bit flopping about in my trousers, unrestrained by cumbersome underwear, as I go about my busy day hitting on babes and sharing my wisdom and good looks with them,” Mr. Trump said earlier.   “I want the world to know, that when I become President in November, the first thing I’m going to do is declare every second Friday a “commando” day.  It will be a day when all men in America will be able to walk about, free from the confines of underwear, and shake their pelvises at every woman they find attractive without fear of any legal repercussion whatsoever.   I can think of no better act a President can do for his country than this…well, except for maybe making orange the new color of the American flag.  God bless America, and God bless a freed willy!”

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19 thoughts on “Donald Trump Admits He Never Wears Underwear

  1. Another reason not to elect the lunatic: I may not live in the US but nobody should have to suffer “commando” days, even if it is ‘just’ every second Friday shudders

  2. Brilliantly messed up lol

  3. A Couple things, not to in anyway distract from your reporting. 1) I heard that the orange monster is so upset because he has such a short penis it wouldn’t be even bothered by the tightest of whities. 2) If men get to walk “willie Free” does that mean woman can walk ” breats free” . Last thing, sadly the thought of the “orange willy” waggling free made me throw up a bit in my mouth so excuse me I have to go brush and scope. Hugs

  4. While I support free willys everywhere, I cannot support Agent Orange.

  5. Why do I like this idea?

  6. The sad thing about Trump is that even when you read satire involving him, it takes a while to figure out if it’s true or not because it’s perfectly plausible.

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