Washington, D.C. In one of his final acts as President, Barack Obama today revoked the Second Amendment and banned all private ownership of firearms. In addition, President Obama said he will use every branch of the U.S. Military to remove every gun from every household in America starting tomorrow at 6AM EST. Anyone failing to comply with this Presidential decree will be summarily executed on the spot. Anyone attempting to hide a gun or guns, will be summarily executed on the spot. Lastly, anyone complaining about any of this will be summarily executed on the spot. Thanks for your time, and may God bless America.