Poor ‘Lil Kitty Cat Food Keeps The Poor Healthy Enough To Starve To Death
Meowville, North Carolina. Are you so lazy it makes you poor? Do you find yourself having to eat cat and dog food because you can’t afford anything else to eat? Do you wish there were a pet food that was so packed with nutrients it could help alleviate some of your nutritional concerns as you patiently await death by starvation? Well, then, we here at Conservative Pet Foods, Inc have just the thing for you: ‘Lil Kitty Cat Food. ‘Lil Kitty Cat Food was created by GOP scientists especially for poor and disabled people who are too lazy, drunk and stupid to look for work. Why suffer with poor nutrition as you await the Grim Reaper? Stop eating the trash of your wealthier neighbors and pick up a few cans of ‘Lil Kitty Cat Food today. Your neighbors will thank you for it, as will the police they call every time they catch you digging through their garbage for scraps. Order a few cans now, for just .55 cents a piece, and we’ll toss in a Jesus Hates Beggars T-shirt absolutely free, while supplies last.
*This message has been approved by the Republican National Committee to wipe out the hungry by 2018.
The Arm Chair Pontificator 
Reblogged this on A Tale Unfolds and commented:
This is one of the funniest pieces of writing I have read in years.
True comic genius.
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Thanks so much. Yours is an intellect I greatly admire, so this compliment coming from you is highly flattering. $Amen$
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The GOP war on poverty — perfect! All that’s missing are bootstraps.
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Indeed.
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So wait. How does a conversation about cat food develop to one about The Donald?
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Just good luck, I guess.
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I would like it on toast… but I can’t afford the toast.
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An all too familiar story.
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I have told Ron that by the time we get to retire we will have to fight the cats for their “fancy Feast” and not only will we lose but I think I prefer the dry cat food to the canned wet stuff. I think they make the Alpo dog food for the really poor in the south. 🙂 😀 Hugs
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I believe they do.
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Reblogged this on FlynnsPaws Blogs and commented:
Sounds good! I’ll have Kitty order some for Bastet.
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Awesome.
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Do they give you a discount if you were to buy it by the case?
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You get an extra 3 days of life, but few to no poor starving folk can afford to do that.
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That kitty food looks so scrumptious, I’d like to feed some of it to tRump!
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He might like it. I hear he eats his prime rib well done. A dirty gym shoe would taste better than that.
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I’m sold, the Jesus Hates Beggars T-shirt clinched it for me!
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A very popular item.
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This is so sad
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It sure is.
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Boris, one of our dogs, eats more expensive food than we generally do. He also goes to the day spa twice a week. He has special needs.
Viva Trump!
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My dog does OK, too. Cruz dropped out. I wonder what it means when God’s chosen for the Presidency, the one who will welcome the impending apocalypse and the second coming of Christ, drops out of the race because he was ass-whipped by a thuggish bully like Trump? Apparently, his god is a really big idiot when it comes to predictions and picking prophets.
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Well, at least we found out who really killed JFK
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Right. Great insight by Trump to see through Cruz’s pappy’s murderous cloak.
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It was brilliant. The guy on Bloomberg yesterday described Cruz’s reaction as a Psych-bomb went off in his head. That’s glorious!
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Did you see his campaign appearance where Carly Fiorina fell down in front of him and he just ignored it? Dude melted down completely. Oh, he brags that he spanks his daughter, too. Ain’t she a lucky child?
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Saw her fall last night. It’s always funny the way they just disappear.
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Gotta feel badly for Jesus now. He’ll have to cancel his second coming.
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