04.16.16
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39 Year-Old Discovers He Has Emotional Maturity Of 6 Year-Old

39 Year-Old, Bill Meelater

39 Year-Old, Bill Meelater

Columbus, Ohio.   39 year-old Columbus native, Bill Meelater, learned this morning that he has the emotional maturity of a 6 year-old.  “My girlfriend told me this morning, when she found me putting matches by my anus as I farted, that she was leaving me because I had the emotional maturity of a 6 year-old,” Mr. Meelater said earlier.  “My immediate response was to shout loudly at her, ‘I know you are, but what am I?!’ I quickly realized my response really made no sense so I stuck my tongue out at her and called her a dooty-face.  She huffed, told me to never call her again, and then stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door shut as she did.  After she left, I cried a little because I realized she was right.  I do have the emotional maturity of a 6 year-old.  It may not be a good thing, but it sure as hell is a lot better than being a dooty-face, I’ll tell ya’ that.  So up her nose with a rubber hose.”

15 thoughts on “39 Year-Old Discovers He Has Emotional Maturity Of 6 Year-Old”

  1. Cats might be able to help !!! When Ron and I are a bit off, my cats wait for him to walk by and then reach out and swat him with their paws, sometimes they snag his clothes…He doesn’t dare say anything to or against them as I am there…but I know he stews about it.. That will teach him to treat us like Royalty …..:D Hugs

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  2. Well, good luck to him finding a new GF! 😀

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  3. Relationships can be soooo stressful. Especially when you use matches to … well, you know.

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  4. The names of your characters, as always, are special

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