Group Of Christmas Trees Sue Christians For Harassment

These Trees Are Tired Of Being Killed And Made Into Decorations

These Trees Are Tired Of Being Killed And Made Into Decorations

Evergreen Valley, New Hampshire.   A group of potential Christmas trees today filed a harassment suit against Christians.   “They’re tired of being killed every Christmas season by Christians just to become decorations in their homes,” Christmas tree spokeswoman, Betty “Bristles” Malloy, said this morning.  “It’s time these trees be left alone to live their lives in peace and quite.  They’ve been being murdered every Christmas for over a century just to be strung up in the homes of Christians and decorated with lights.  Their dried out corpses are then discarded into alleyways across the world without any chance for a proper, decent burial.  This is, without a doubt, harassment, and it needs to stop.  Christmas tree lives matter!”

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14 thoughts on “Group Of Christmas Trees Sue Christians For Harassment

  1. There’s another victim in my living room right now, I’m filled with shame after reading this 😉

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  2. Do catholic priests wrap up little boys and put them under each others trees to be unwrapped on Christmas morning? Hey is putting a Christmas tree in the same room as a fire place a war crime? So many questions. Hugs

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  3. I think Mak meant the trees. . . 🙂

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  4. Oh, the humanity… err, I mean Pinales-ity!

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  5. I’m a lawyer and I’m offering my FREE services to institute a class action against the Protestants, the Mormons, and all other Christian sects and for good measure against His Noodleness (The Pope NOT the Flying Spaghetti Monster – given the Catholic clergy’s record against boys).

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