“I will give this really tasty fish I just caught to anyone who can find me a shirt to go with these amazing pants I’m wearing.”
“It’s OK, Eve. I know we just got kicked outta Eden, and it truly was a great place to live, but, really, how bad can things actually be out here in the real world?”
“Check it out! I just squished a three-tailed mouse between my heels!”
“Here’s how this works: every time you fart in a crowd, turn around really fast and point to the guy next to you. That way, everyone will think it was him.”
The Arm Chair Pontificator 
Dammit! I miss all the fun! I gotta get back to keeping up with my blog buddies. Life is busy atm.
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My atm WOULD be busy, but I’m so poor, there’s nothin’ in it to withdraw.
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…unless we can figure out how to withdraw other peoples money 🙂
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Indeed.
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I was late in on your exchange with Bobbie, but it was well-worth it. Hilarious going. I’ve never seen him rattled like that.
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I know. I really wasn’t even trying that hard. And what I was saying was just gibberish. I have to do a post on that swear word laden comment he made to me. I mean, that was pure beauty. “The Christian Wt The Mouth Of A Sailor” I’ll call it. Sorry if I chewed into your post and comments with that, but god damn, that was fun.
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I don’t care. That’s a public forum, and my job is to promote Poe’s Laws, anyway, and you, Sir, are a master at it.
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Thanks. Even when you told him what I was doing, he still didn’t get it. Not the brightest lamp post on the street, eh?
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He’s a devil. I doubt he’s for real, though.
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Yeah. Perhaps. The most stringent christians out there, i.e., CS and SoM, don’t let their guard down and fire off swear word laden insults like that, at least not to my recollection. I pushed a button of some kind in ole Bobbie. Funny how he kept calling for you to chastise me for being such an irreverent brute to him. Damn, that’s the kind of exchange a sick SOB like me dreams of creating and I DID IT!!!! 😀
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Was gonna do a post on this, but changed my mind. Not funny enough. On a last note, I think what hit Bobbie’s button was the comments I was making about what’s on his computer. I was rambling, as I’m want to do, but I think the computer comments got him. I wonder what he has on his computer that a good Christian shouldn’t? Hmmmm???
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If I am beaten after trying this advice, I will blame it on you
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Works every time. Guaranteed. I had some christian dude named “bobbie” calling me ALL kinds of nasty names yesterday on John’s blog. I mean, he was cussing me out left and right. Fun. I think I’ll copy his comments to me and do a post. It truly was beautiful. I talked gibberish, and he just kept getting madder and madder.
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I should check that out. You know how to piss off the religious. Did he call you Muslim?
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He called me a fat, anti-spiritual, hate-filled mother fucking dickhead. I forgot what else. Totally beautiful stuff from the mouth of a Tru-Christian. I wasn’t doing my Muslim routine. I was doing the gay flirtatious character I do, and I told him I was only 16 and would be sending the police to arrest him for bothering me, pure nonsense, but he took the bait like puppy takes to a steak bone. These pompous christian types just can’t get enough of their own bullshit.
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That was an interesting conversation you guys had
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I talked nonsense, and he got all pissed off. Kinda fun.
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