Silent Town, Oregon. An old mime friend of mine, Meme D. Mime, stopped by The Arm Chair Pontificator office yesterday to return a pen he borrowed from me in the 90’s. In order to prevent me from kicking his ass for taking so long to return it, Meme agreed to be interviewed for the site. The interview, completely unaltered from when I first made it up, follows below.
ACP: Thanks for agreeing to be interviewed, Meme. Though, I gotta tell ya, I’m still tempted to kick your ass for taking so long to return my pen. Just not cool dude. Pens aren’t easy to come by. What do you have to say for yourself?
ACP: Oh, don’t be a pussy, Meme. I’m just fuckin’ with you. Ya gotta lighten up a bit. You’ll give yourself a heart attack.
ACP: What? You want a hug? OK. Just this once, but don’t tell anyone. I’ve a reputation to uphold.
ACP: OK. You’re welcome. Now, let’s get back to the questions. Since I haven’t seen you in a few years, I was wondering, what have you been doing with yourself to make a living?
ACP: Really? You’ve been touring with the musical Cats playing Rum Tum Tugger? I had no idea you could sing. You’ve got to get me tickets next time you’re in town with the show. It’ll make up for the pen you took 20 years to return to me.
ACP: What do you mean you’ve got to think about that? You’re an a-hole, pal. You know that?
ACP: Oh, so you were just fuckin’ with me this time, eh? OK. You got me. You can have one more hug, but then ya probably should go. It’s gettin’ so sugary sweet in here I’m gettin’ a tooth ache.
ACP: You’re outta here, eh? OK, Meme. Good seeing you. Stop by again soon, and remember, get me tickets to Cats when you’re in town with the show. Bye now.