04.02.15
by

Christ Appears Nude In Gay Bathhouse

Cockland, Indiana.   In news today that’s sent waves of confusion throughout gay-hating Christendom, Jesus appeared, completely nude, at a gay bathhouse in Indiana called, The Tommy Snoodle & Jimmy Doodle Scrub & Bubble Club. “It was INSANE,” said club co-owner Jimmy Doodle. “I was getting the baths ready for the day’s fun by filling them with hot water and bubbles when suddenly there was a pink flash of light and there, right before my eyes, Jesus was standing, completely nude. He sat back on one of our custom designed bubble resistant mats and said to me, ‘Hi, Cowboy, wanna go for a ride on the sacred pony express?’

Jesus, Naked

Jesus, As He Appeared Today In A Gay, Indiana, Bathhouse

I almost died right there.  I said, ‘Yes, Lord, I do,’ and He said, ‘Well, Jimmy Doodle, before you can do that, I need for you to speak out to the people of Indiana. Tell them you saw me here today, in your bathing house for manly, gay men, naked as the day my virgin mother birth me. More specifically, tell them if they own a business, and choose to deny service to gay people, I’m going to become very angry with them. So angry, that I will not let them into the big bathhouse in the sky when they die. Can you do that for me, Jimmy Doodle?’ I told him, ‘Yes, Jesus, I can,’ and then he gave me a long open mouth kiss and said, ‘I’m leaving now, Jimmy Doodle, but I’ll return soon to check on you and let you ride the sacred pony express. Until then, stay gay, and keep on bathing in frothy bubbles with other burly men. Amen.’  Then there was another pink flash, and he was gone. It was crazy and incredibly HOT at the same time. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a lot of Indiana businesses to visit with the word of God.”

41 thoughts on “Christ Appears Nude In Gay Bathhouse”

  1. Pingback: Christ Appears Nude In Gay Bathhouse – brendongormley

  3. Hahaha your posts are THE best!

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  5. Yay my brother, go and preach the Gospel of Naked Jesus to all the land, that they may be enlightened. He, or she, that cometh, cometh in joy. Gezallahbuddhamohammad!

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  6. One of the great points they love to claim from the bible is that Jesus welcomed any one, and everyone. He was anti government and religion of his time and spent time with those the religion of the time shunned. so to turn anyone away from any place or service in that name never makes sense to me. I love the idea of Jesus giving a ride on the sacred pony express. Look my view is sex is one of the best things we have for feeling well and happy, and any deity I can imagine would not only want us to be happy, but would want to be happy itself. second with everything a deity must have to do if it existed, can it really find time to worry about the sex organs of two moving dust motes? I think not, He has too many foot ball games to fix. Hugs

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  8. i think this important in making a joke of that law signed by Pence.
    If reason can’t work with them, ridicule should

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  9. 🙂 LOL this is my new favorite. every line is hilarious…i don’t know if appears means,we think he may be nude or if appears means, he is appearing in a really big bubblebath show, but either way hysterical

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  10. Reblogged this on The Blogging Path and commented:

    Ah, what a fine specimen! All decked out in his birthday suit and looking handsome, even for a gay guy, and comfortable, too.

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  11. Yes, they even censored their own bible. Recently discovered in a dark corner of the Vatican library, the original gospel text: “Love your brother – carnally.” Millions of Christians are sure to be horrified that they’ve been doing it wrong all along (others will simply take the opportunity to finally come out of the closet).

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  12. Crucifixion Green Hill v Brokeback Mountain!

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