I’m really sick of listening to homophobic, hate-filled bullshit from Christians and Conservatives. Fucking sick of it. Though I’m not gay myself, I’ve seen gays portrayed in TV shows and in movies. From these portrayals, I’ve come to understand that gay people are actually just humans, no different from myself, except for the cock sucking and man-gina riding, that is. This being said, I’ve come to the conclusion that homophobia is a severe mental illness: A mental illness from which humanity must be cured if it is to survive. Let me tell you my plan for curing it.
First, I must gain the power of a god and become ruler of America. Once I do this, and it may take a while because it’s never been done before, I’ll make the following decrees which, in time, will eliminate homophobia.
1.) On their 18th birthday, every person, whether or not they’ve done it already, MUST have sex with a member of the same-sex. Girls will lick pussy, and boys will suck cock. Some will like it, and some will really not like it, but all will do it. This way, every man will have sucked dick, and every woman will have suckled on a pussy at least once in their life. After this, it’s up to the individual if they liked it enough to do it again, or not. The point is, EVERYONE will have to do it.
2.) If, at any point in a person’s life after this, they utter a homophobic comment, or worse yet, make such a comment because they claim some imaginary god hates gays, they will have to have sex with a member of the same-sex for the rest of their lives or simply not have sex. This way, no matter how much someone may think they hate gays, they will hate me far more if they don’t change their thinking.
3.) Every religion that states its god hates gays will be dissolved. Period. Actually, every religion stating it is correct and others are wrong will be dissolved. So, if a religion makes you happy to practice it, yippy for you. Practice it. Just remember, you will not be allowed to judge and condemn anyone because of it. Period. Shut up and enjoy your religion nicely, or I’ll wipe it out. Kapeesh?
And there you have it. My solutions to homophobia. Imperious Rex!
love the part where if you have a faith , enjoy it and don’t judge others or lose it. Hgus
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I have a faith in human beings in the here and now. 🙂
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Oh. And I strongly judge others who judge me. Fuck them.
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I really love the comment here in response to the one I made. These quotes show how far from personal faith fanatics have gone….https://myatheistlife.wordpress.com/2015/02/09/is-anti-theism-a-valid-position/#comment-9954
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Crazy. I know. Why can’t it just be OK to let people believe as they wish in their hearts, privately, without ramming it down others throats? I don’t care at all what someone believes if it helps them in the world and in their life to believe it. I only care and get REALLY pissed off when it is shoved onto me and I am “condemned” in their eyes for not believing as they do. Also, I get incensed when religion is injected into government and used as an excuse to deny gay couples the right to get married under the secular law of our land. Fuck that shit. “myatheistlife” is a great site. I really like reading his posts.
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I totally agree. well said. Hugs
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😀
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Thanks for the giggles. 🙂
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Homophobia is a mental illness – sociopathy.
But, as much as I respect anyone’s right to suck c**k, I ain’t doing it!
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Then you must really hope that I don’t become a deity, cause things are gonna change! ‘Course, if I become a deity, I’d probably just find another, less hateful, planet to live on, but it most likely won’t happen at all. My deity application has come back and I wasn’t accepted. 🙂
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That’s a shame because I think you’d be an exceptional, fair-minded deity. And, if that ever happened, I don’t believe you would force me to suck c**k. Authoritarianism doesn’t seem to be part of your nature. 🙂
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No. I wouldn’t. My harshest judgements are for homophobic a-holes and fundamentalist, conservatist, douch-bag christians. Put a good word in for me with the deity approval board if they ask about me. I’d sure love ta be one. 😀
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Will do!
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Thanks my friend.
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Your proposal sounds solid. But you realise that the biggest homophobes are the latent homosexuals themselves, don’t you? They’ve already acted according to your plan, but it was certainly not enough to change their minds. I admire your sense of justice.
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Yes, but my solutions are public ones. EVERYONE will know what you’ve done. The homophobes who hate outwardly but covet the same sex inwardly will have no way to hide or deny that they too have suckled on the forbidden fruit of another man or woman and thus their hatred will be obviously self directed. Thanks for reading and commenting. 🙂
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So I laughed and then that pic turned me on – not the second one, the third one – then I laughed again. I’m a sick, twisted individual and I love your posts…..think about it….what does that say about you? 😉
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It says you’re my kinda woman! And, you’re pretty darned sexy too! 🙂
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Haha you do crack me up 😉
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Yer just sayin’ that cause ya thinks I’m sexy. 🙂
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Oh yeah, you found me out #Busted 😉
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🙂
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I’ve been proposing rule number one for a long time now.
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It would work. Everyone would do it, and everyone would know it.
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Funny, I recently posted a comment somewhere that suggested homosexuality should become a religion instead of a sexual preference. That way the American Constitution would have no choice but to take gays as seriously as christians…
So I’m guessing you could be the god to that religion if you like (at least the position is open and you seem qualified for the job;))
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I accept. I can’t wait to see the look on Fred Phelps face when I make him suck cock for the first time, that we know of. 😀 I’d LOVE IT!!!!
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Excellent suggestion!
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Isn’t though?
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Your rules are tough but I see how they could work.
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There would be great protest, but, too bad.
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Yes, that’s not nearly enough required sex! How about, “You must have sex with two people, not of the same sex, on every birthday from the day you turn eighteen until the day you die – and no repeats!”
It will probably save a few marriages, too!
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Toss in a chicken, and there we go!
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I’m not sure I got that, but I’m afraid to ask.
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I’ve no idea what it means. I just think everything is funnier with a chicken running around. Maybe not. I am insane after all.
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Point 3 is good – I will always fight on the side of the gays/lesbians or indeed any group that is frowned upon for no good reason. So much hate in the world, so much important stuff needs correcting/resolving – why do the religions take time out marginalizing the gay community when ’tis none of their business in part or at all; it’s not even an issue any one should even be thinking about? Well that’s me pissed off before breakfast – best go back to the pills!
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Point one is the one that’ll change the world. Just imagine that! Extreme, but, hell, that’s just me.
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The English lyricist/poet Billy Bragg – one of Mr Danton’s own – once penned, ‘If you’ve got a black list I want to be on it.’ You Sir, are fighting the good cause in a similar manner – keep it going!
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That is a wonderful compliment. I know the poet and quote of which you speak. Cheers to you, my friend.
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I’m not a huge fan of Gervais, but i did like this sketch:
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I did too. He’s got one on homosexuality in the animal kingdom that’s a riot. I’ll send a link if I find it.
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Here you go: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OIcrCZQkSlg
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NIce
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It would be interesting.
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OMGawd — 😀
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Yes. May I help you? 😀
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You sexy thang. Zap me with that bolt of yours. 😀
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Will do. One zap coming right up via carrier pigeon. 🙂
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Wonders never cease.
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Not ones involving zaps from my bolt any way. 🙂
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Well, you make it hurt so good. 😈
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And all with just a bit of gorilla glue and an itty bitty bolt ‘o lightenin’.
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What can I say…you’re just soooo creative.
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Well, yes, with gorilla glue and lightenin’ bolts. Now, if I could just apply it elsewhere, I’d be famous, or, at least I’d have fewer restraining orders against me. 🙂
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LOL
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