Gerald Ford Rises From Grave Only To Trip And Fall Back In

Jedi Temple, Coruscant.  According to Jedi sources embedded within the Republican Party, an ancient Sith practice, last performed by Darth Nixon himself, was recently used to resurrect Lord Nixon’s Dark Side apprentice, Gerald Ford, from the grave in order to obliterate Obama Care and its creator, President Obi Wan “Barack” Obama himself.

Artist's Rendering Of Gerald Ford Falling Back Into His Grave

Artist Rendering Of Gerald Ford Falling Back Into His Grave

The plan failed, however, when Ford, true to his former form, tripped on the edge of his grave while climbing out and fell back in, crushing his decaying skull to fragments in the process. A cry of rage went up from the hundreds of Republicans who had gathered to witness this dark event. As they left, they swore that the power of the Dark Side would yet prevail, and all non-Christians, along with all those living below the poverty line, would, indeed, be destroyed.

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13 thoughts on “Gerald Ford Rises From Grave Only To Trip And Fall Back In

  1. It seems the dark side is slipping..er…a little EH? Love your reporting, you get more news scoops than any other Nobel prize winning almost but not yet station out there! How do you do it. I wish you could give such smarts to congress and such grace to the Republican election losers…who hang around like odors in a subway bathroom ( also know as the waiting bench ) and come back again like my “want to be a cook” sons attempts to be meals. Belch. Thanks again for the help you give all the little people. 🙂 Hugs

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  2. “crushing his decaying skull to fragments in the process.” – that was easy, there was nothing in it; never was.

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  3. Serves him right

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  4. “Darth Nixon” lol.

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