Scent Of Ham: The Ken Ham Cologne

Who Wouldn't Want To Think And Smell Like Ken Ham?

Who Wouldn’t Want To Think And Smell Like This Guy?

Men, would you like to attract women by emitting the scent of a Bronze Age Biblical writer? Women, would you find yourselves more eager to flop down and open your thighs for men if they smelled like Bronze Age Biblical writers? If you answered yes to these questions, then TACP store has just the product for you: Scent of Ham. A cologne that is guaranteed to make its wearer not only smell like Ken Ham, but think like him as well. Never before has there been a cologne that can reduce a man’s frontal cortex to the size of an amoeba while making his sweat glands as big as golf balls with one simple application. With one spray of Scent of Ham, even Richard Dawkins would be willing to stake his life on the fact the Earth is only 6000 years old and evolution is an atheist plot meant to prepare the world for the Anti-Christ. The primitive, manly aroma of Scent of Ham is so powerful, it can revive the sex drives of women who have been dead for centuries. They will literally leap from their graves as men wearing it pass by so they can get a better whiff before returning to the cold, dank earth. Buy a bottle now, while supplies last, and receive a free Crucifix, molded directly from the fossilized poop of a T-Rex, absolutely free!

65 thoughts on “Scent Of Ham: The Ken Ham Cologne

  1. i don’t know if you will think this is funny, but i am laughing. i went to the encyclopedia, i mean google , after i asked myself ,who is richard dawkins, again. isn’t he on hogan’s heros…..no, that’s richard dawson.

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  2. I’m tempted to try this one just to see the dead women rising, but the other effect of thinking like Hammy isn’t worth it. I value my ability not to think like KH.

    If you could separate those effects and market them individually I might buy both of them. The dead rising for kicks on the weekend, and the think like KH for special occaisions. That does wear off later…right?

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  3. Could I trade it in for an actual leg of ham? 🙂

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  4. I’ll wait for the Ham-on-a-Rope 🙂

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  5. Thanks, I just showered my laptop with coffee spray!

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  6. ‘Scent of Ham’ – the much fable choice of tossers everywhere!

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  7. Oh Geez! This made spit through my nostrils, thanks!

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