Conservatives Get Law Passed Which Bans Nudity 24/7

 Republican About To Shower In  Non-Nude Suit

Republican About To Shower In Non-Nude Suit

A bill which makes being naked for any reason at any time illegal was passed into law today by the United States House and Senate. “Being naked is the pathway to perversions like homosexuality, masturbation, bestiality, and sex out of wed-lock,” said Republican Senator, Hee Haw Johnson of Texas. “From now on, if any American is ever naked for any reason, they will be strip searched, cavity searched, arrested, and held without bond until they confess to their sick prurient lust for children and pets. Lastly, anyone taking a shower is now required to wear an outfit like the one shown above. Those found showering nude will be summarily executed on the spot,” Senator Hee Haw said.

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37 thoughts on “Conservatives Get Law Passed Which Bans Nudity 24/7

  1. BREAKING NEWS: Senator Hee Haw Johnson, just hours after his anti-nudity bill passed congress, was found hiding nude in a grammar schoolroom closet near his Texas home. He was carrying a clerical vestment and a recent copy of Boys World magazine.

    Local police refused to release any further details of the incident. They wouldn’t confirm reports of Johnson’s arrest or that under-age children might have been involved. Breaking News Service (BNS) uncovered the story accidentally when one of our staff members – who lives next door to the Senator – happened to observe the police escorting him home around 9pm and overheard their conversation.

    Sen. Johnson’s office contacted our legal team at 10pm and made inquiries about a possible videotape in our possession. BNS would neither confirm nor deny the existence of such evidence.

    Film at 11:00.

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  2. Whenever I don’t feel good about myself I just think about republicans.

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  3. you fucking bastard mate
    regards
    Mike Steeden

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  4. Presumably said Senator wears boxing gloves in bad?

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  5. Oh dear — naked a baby comes into this world, then booked and off to jail.
    Way to go Texas. The cesspool of America.

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  6. Whatever goes on in that head of yours, I really would want to live there even if just for a few minutes.

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