“Funny you should ask,” said Moses during a break today from promoting his new book, ‘Dating Tips for the Biblically Ancient’. ” I just so happen to have brought my Christmas want list with me. I’ve learned over the years that if I don’t loudly tell people what I want I won’t get anything. Some folks assume because I’m Jewish I don’t celebrate Christmas. To them I say, nonsense, Jesus has been my golfing partner for, like, 1500 years. I think the least I could do is celebrate the dude’s birthday.” Moses then went on to list a multitude of items he wanted from his rocky list. Since most of these items haven’t existed for almost 4000 years, so we won’t bother to list them here.
*Moses and the Biblical inhabitants of the after-life would like to wish the readers of The Arm Chair Pontificator a very Merry Christmas, and a very drunk, but safe New Year.