Check out these porn movies that will soon be available on The Arm Chair Pontificator adult streaming channel.
1.) The Godfather: Part BIG. I actually star in this little beauty of an erotic masterpiece as The Butler: A mysterious and dashingly handsome man-servant to the Godfather. A Mafia Don with a monstrously huge dick and an insatiable lust for 20-year-old women who dress as Catholic School girls. If you like impeccably subtle writing, stellar acting, especially by yours truly, and award-winning art design, this is the porn film you were born to see.
Yours Truly As The Butler In The Godfather: Part BIG
2.) Raiders of the Lost Quim. Join Indiana Johnson and his bevy of naked beauties as they frolic their way through the Middle East in search of good curry and the sacred, lost, missing quim of the Virgin Mary. This baby is loaded with mind-boggling CGI effects and actors so hot they’ll warm your blood for decades. You won’t want to miss it!
Indiana Johnson
3.) Jesus Christ, Sexy Star. A Musical, erotic romp through the New Testament with Jesus, Mary Magdalene, and The Holy Spirit. If you think porn flicks and huge Broadway musicals don’t mix, you’re in for a surprise when you see Jesus Christ, Sexy Star. Just because the tenors are nude and sporting huge boners does not mean they can’t sing. And, baby, can these boys SING! After viewing this movie, you’ll never be able to have sex again without its soundtrack playing in your head.
Jesus Christ, Sexy Star
4.) Mary Does Bethlehem. Join the Virgin Mary as she kicks in doors and raids the gay bath houses of Bethlehem wearing nothing but a smile in search of Jesus’ dead-beat dad, Joseph. If you like action with your mindless sex, this is the film you’ve been waiting for. As an added bonus, 80’s porn legend, Ron Jeremy, has been cast in the film as the Inn, and Out, Keeper. This is not a movie you’ll want to miss.
Mary Says: Where My Baby Daddy At?
5.) It’s A Wonderful C*ck. Join George, The Wad, Baily and the rest of the townsfolk of Dickford Balls as they fight off the evil Mr. Pooper, a tyrannical fundamentalist Christian who’s trying to outlaw sex of any kind from their town. This film is sure to become a Christmas classic, so be sure to gather the whole family together and watch it when it premiers this Thanksgiving on The Arm Chair Pontificator adult streaming channel.
I Swear To God, Mary, It’s THIS Big!
The Arm Chair Pontificator 
LOL where’s my baby daddy
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A question asked far too often these days. 🙂
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lol 🙂
i’m gonna sue ,whoever keeps taking you out of the reader,so you hear me XP
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It’s Jesus. The bastard HATES me. 🙂
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LOL that’s logical.. i meant do not so, but you know that.. i wonder if they had matzo ball souo back then
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If they didn’t, they had even shittier lives than I’ve ever imagined. 🙂
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lol 🙂 i know ..how they lived without tv and pillows ,i’ll never know
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🙂
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🙂
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All I can say is #1 and #2 above = YUM. Good night!
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Pleasant dreams.
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Just send me the link once you upload them online
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I’ll send it to you via carrier pigeon first thing today.
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Is this imaginary?
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Only if you literally want it to be.
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It just got complicated
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Only if you imagine it to be.
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And here you said I wouldn’t make a good apologist! Who’s laughing now you heathen fellow!? Who’s laughing now?!
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That’s about my weekly dose of man meat
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That’s what she said! 😀
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Badah-Boom!
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And…..Curtain!
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Ha! The Armchair Porntificator!
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Yep. That’s me. Always looking for new avenues to make no money in. 🙂
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