Elmer Fudd, the beloved Warner Bros cartoon character, announced today that he will no longer hunt for his elusive arch nemesis, Bugs Bunny. Instead, Mr. Fudd stated, he will point his rifle at targets easier to hit, namely, liberals, a-theists and anyone having ever read a book by Christopher Hitchens or Richard Dawkins. “Bugs was just too hard to kill,” Mr. Fudd said. “Wiberals and dose who don’t beeweeve in our Ward Jeebus Chwist are easier to kill and deserb to die fer der horrible beweefs.”
It’s uncertain how seriously Mr. Fudd’s threat should be taken, however, because he is only a cartoon character firing cartoon bullets. Thus, the likelihood of anyone actually being hurt by him is practically nonexistent.
Do we need bullet proof vests?
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Only imaginary ones.
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ah at least, that shouldn’t be too hard to get
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Nope. Like religion, all you have to do is make it up.
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I was getting there
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Amen
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I had a friend apply for a job the other day. One of the requirements was that “you surrender yourself to the Lord Jesus Christ.” Good grief.
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Nice.
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If he were hunting Consewbatibs he might have more success. They’re always troubled by imaginary threats.
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That’s my job. 😀
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Well, god’s non-existent and fictional, but he hurt a lot of people too it seems. I’m very ‘verweed’…
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I’ll have to ask Bugs Bunny what he thinks next time I see him.
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Ahh, I wuv him!
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Thank you vewy, vewy much. 😀
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If I were a christian wiberal, I would be very afraid of Mr. Fudd. As I would then believe an imaginary authority figure created me, cartoon bullets must be real.
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Wiberals and Cwistians are two diffwent cweatures. Elmer hunts wiberals, not bewievers in Jeebus Cwist.
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I’ll be on the lookout. Thanks.
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Please be careful. Should Fudd find and confront you, start singing, “I Wish I Were In Dixie.” It’s his favorite song and will distract him so you can run away.
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