Intelligent Design Is Ridiculously Unintelligent, Jesus Says

Jesus Says, "Come On, Dudes, Ya must Be Joking! I May Be Smart, But I'm Not THAT Smart!"

Jesus Says, “Come On, Dudes, Ya must Be Joking! I May Be Smart, But I’m Not THAT Smart!”

Jesus today stated that He is embarrassed by the stupidity exhibited by far too many human beings. “What kind of moron thinks I actually sat down and designed the universe,” Christ said earlier. “I mean has anyone of the chowder heads who believe this crap actually read a physics book? That is some hard shit, man. I mean, I was like a Shakespeare, English Lit type of dude in high school, not a god damned science major. I may be smart, but not THAT smart. I still have no fucking idea what a “Higgs boson” is. WAY over my head, dudes. When I moved to this universe after my last divorce, it was as is. Fuck if I know how it got made. Maybe it just came from nothing, like me. Any way, knock off the shit people and just fucking be nice to each other. I recall leaving instructions to that effect somewhere down there. Read those and leave the science to people who can admit it when they don’t have a fucking answer to something. Intelligent Design? Right. Give me a break!”

 

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6 thoughts on “Intelligent Design Is Ridiculously Unintelligent, Jesus Says

  1. Nice one – he could be addressing the UN Assembly with that!

    Like

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