I’ve a great idea. I know it’s great because I thought of it, and like the Good Book says, “Those who think their ideas are great and have the balls to say so, have great ideas.” Thus, my idea is great. So, here it is: Make the day after Mother’s Day, “Mother Fucker’s Day”. Let me set the scenario for you. You’ve just finished an exhausting dinner with your mother, a middle age crabby person who takes every opportunity she has to remind you of just how disappointed she is in you, and you’re angry in a pent-up, gotta get relief or bust kinda way. You can’t yell at your mom and tell her what you actually think of her. No way. The Bible forbids it, and you’ll burn in Hell for it. So, here’s my answer for you. Send someone, even a dead someone, a “Mother Fucker’s Day” card the very next day and regain your equilibrium.
Happy Mother Fucker’s Day To Hitler: A True Mother Fucker
For example, I sent Hitler a “Mother Fucker’s Day” card this morning that read,”Dear Hitler, I think you were a real mother fucker to kill all those innocent people like that, and I’m glad you’re dead.” I sealed it; addressed it to, “Adolf H.,The Bunker Remains, Berlin, Germany'” and mailed it off first thing this morning. Hell, it doesn’t matter if it actually ever gets there. No. What matters is I blew off steam by calling a mother fucker a mother fucker, and I feel good about it. So, I declare the day after every Mother’s Day from this day forward to be, “Mother Fucker’s Day” and ask Hallmark to make cards especially for it. They, and you, will be the happier for it.
The Arm Chair Pontificator 
This is a holiday I can get behind…figuratively speaking of course;)
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Yes indeed. It’s one we sorely need. It would prevent terrorism, I believe, if we had this as a world-wide holiday.
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Good point, hadn’t even thought of that, but you’re right. If people can express ALL their emotions in a Hallmark card, they wouldn’t feel the need to blow each other up. The moment Osama’s location would have been found, he’d been sent a very angry and insulting card!
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“Dear Osama, you are a mother fucker. Love, the free world.”
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End of conflict. Period.
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You made me laugh. I feel so much better. Thanks.
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No problem. That’s why I’m here.
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My Man!
Great post!
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Thanks. Was watching a documentary on Lenny Bruce and the idea hit me. Why? Don’t know. Maybe Lenny was speaking to me. Love that guy.
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Send me the link…
I may not have seen it.
Thks.
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It’s called “Looking For Lenny”. Came out in 2011 and I streamed it from Netflix.
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Great! I will find it.
Thanks My Good Friend.
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Let me know what you think after viewing it.
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Speaking of Lenny Bruce, I was reminded of my favorite quote by him.
“If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses.”
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That’s great. He really set the stage for what we think of as stand up comedy today. He was a brave man and fought a brave fight.
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That indeed is one of my favorites as well. And then this:
“Did you know that Eleanor Roosevelt gave Lou Gehrig the clap?”
🙂
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I love that guy!
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That is a great quote. Am wondering what would happen if he were Muslim with stoning and beheading. Would they be wearing small machetes or stones around their necks?
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Most likely. 😉
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Reblogged this on The Daily Pause and commented:
You are one angry bastard! And I hope your mutha doesn’t know about this blog/post entry! As always, your idea is great for humor’s sake.
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Believe me, it exists only for that sake. Thx for the reblog once again.
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LOL — we should have Happy Father Fucker’s Day, too. Hitler’s mother was caring, his father beat him brutally throughout his young life. Same with Stalin’s father. So I await your Happy Father Fucker’s day post.
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Yep. day after Father’s Day.
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😉
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