In Rome this morning, Fr. Peter Doodelbug, Chief Archeologist of the Vatican, revealed this photograph of The Shroud of Turin which he claims he personally took just yesterday.
“I rolled the Shroud back to take a little peek last night, and its eyes opened! Good thing I had my phone camera on me and was able to take this picture. I also could swear I heard the Shroud speak. It said, ‘Wadda YOU lookin at man?!’ or something to that effect,” Fr. Doodelbug said, as he rode an exercise bike in the Vatican gym while conducting this interview.